THE BROKEN MIRRORMonday, October 30, 20067:59PM - Mini-tour with CoREToday I just arrived back in L.A. after the mini-tour in Seattle and Portland. Despite a few technical difficulties, the weekend was just the experience and/or release that I needed. It is the first time I have performed like that for years. Of course, theese days things seem to be alot more organized(sometimes too organized). But that comes with the territory, not to mention the group I work with. Ahhhhhhhhh, I can breathe again! Current mood:  accomplishedThursday, October 12, 20061:27AM - All I want for my birthday..........Is a new fucking throat. O.k., great company and a nice dinner would be fine. Ok maybe a movie. It is just hard to figure out what to do for your birthday when it is exactly a week after Halloween. Current mood:  sickWednesday, September 20, 20069:32PM - witts endI almost deleted my lj today. A)because I barely use it, b) because I rather not know. Saturday, August 12, 20061:01AM - I'm fortunate......To have people that ground me, people that care, people that comfort me. Not used to having that, but it sure is nice. It especially helps when you really have been down all week. It all it helps bring me back to center. I have alot of things to prepare for so I especially need it right now. Current mood:  contentFriday, August 11, 20063:51AM - HUH? What the fuck?I am so confused right now. The job is going well, my personal life isn't bad for the most part, yet I am still depressed. Maybe it is the fact that I haven't found a place of my own yet. Maybe it is the fact that I am broke until next week. I don't exactly know. All I know is that it has been a fucked up week. But only internally. This I don't really understand. I should be happy, right. I am for the most part, but the depression still lingers. I can't pin point it, and probably won't be able to. I'll be fine, but I am just a bit confused. Oh well, I suppose it will all work out anyway. Everything else has. I guess I am just preparing myself for the worst case scenario. I always do. I mean, it has been my pattern. Just when things start looking up, something always comes along to fuck it all up. God I hope that doesn't happen again. I finally appreciate the things and the people I have in my life. I don't want to change that anymore. I am getting too old for this. And of course I love those that care. You know who you are. Current mood:  blahTuesday, August 8, 20066:18AM - An epiphany of a weekend..................It is a very strange and twisted web we weave. No matter how much you know yourself, there are always tests, and/or challenges in life that we must go through that often make us question, who we are, where exactly do we come from, how sure are we really. I guess it is a part of growing, or maybe even evolving. Most of us know who we are, only when other factors aren't involved. Society has us so on edge, so self absorbed that we sometimes forget not only our surroundings, but who we ACTUALLY ARE. Current mood: contentSunday, August 6, 20066:52AM - FIRST ENTRY.....THE VORTEXOK, OK ALREADY! I GIVE IN. I HAVE TRIED SO HARD NOT TO GET SUCKED INTO THE LIVEJOURNAL PORTAL, OR VORTEX. WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT. BUT IT IS LIKE A BLACK HOLE. THE CLOSER YOU GET TO IT, THE MORE PEOPLE THAT YOU HEAR TALK ABOUT IT, OK, OK, I ADMIT. IT SUCKED ME IN. I AM NOT ASHAMED IN THE LEAST. LIKE THE PEOPLE I CHOSE TO HAVE IN MY LIFE, THE ONES THAT REFLECT ME THE MOST, I LIVE WITH NO REGRETS. THEN AGAIN THE MORE YOU EXPERIENCE IN LIFE, THE BIGGER THE UNIVERSE THAT YOU BUILD INSIDE OF YOURSELF. Current mood:  optimistic |
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